Mommy? Why do you have scribbles?…

This was the question posed to me by my 5 (soon to be six) year old daughter upon silently gate crashing my bedroom (again) and finding me in just a tracksuit pants and bra. I was about to put on the t shirt. I’ve got to learn to lock the damn door. Also, kids can be very quiet when necessary.

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Obviously, to make me feel better after probably seeing the abject shock and horror on my face, she decided to clarify. By pointing. And saying “there, on your tummy, why do you have scribbles?”

Kids are so observant. Don’t for a second think you can fool them.

Like when you’re trying to sneak in a bite of chocolate you’ve been stashing for a while. You know when you went to the hiding place it was quiet and it would be no trouble. Just when you take that bite.. “Mommy, what you eating?”. How the hell do they know?? The quiet should have been my clue. Don’t trust anything if its too quiet.
And yes, I stash treats for myself. I know for dead certain I am not the only parent that does this. Ok? Ok.

Anyway, so back to the matter at hand; the “scribbles” on my tummy. I, firstly, put on my tshirt, then sat her down on the bed and explained while they were in mommy’s tummy, her and her brother grew. As they grew mommy’s tummy stretched. Sometimes when skin stretches and then tries to go back to normal it leaves the marks. “We call it stretch marks” I finished. I was rather proud of myself at the wonderful explanation and fantastic bit of parenting I had accomplished. I deserved a treat for that. She was quiet.
Still feeling the gloating feeling of success my daughter laughed and said “silly scribbles” and proceeded to call her brother to tell him the story. Again, I should have noticed the quiet before getting all “you just won the parent to child info lottery”.

Kids – in the lead
Mommy – trying to get out of the hole

Xoxo
A Little Less Fluff

We All Need To Be Honest Here…

I have always said that the need for moms to be more honest about motherhood is the key to helping one another.

I have been wanting to blog about this for a while now, but as you have noticed it’s almost like I have been swallowed by the world.

I read a post from Celeste over at Reluctant Mom today and it resonated with me. It’s like she has my brain!

Do yourself a favour and read this post and if you genuinely can deny that you NEVER EVER  feel like this at times (regardless of whether your kids were planned, unplanned, or you struggled to conceive), then, well good for you.

http://reluctantmom.wordpress.com/2012/02/08/the-next-person-who/

Feel free to leave comments about this on here too. I love a good debate.

Odds and Ends…

So what do I go and do today? I install TwitVid on my Blackberry. Why you may ask? Because somewhere in my little messed up brain I think I can upload videos to twitter. What videos you may ask? I do not know. I’m still trying to think about why on earth I want to post videos of me (well not of me but of, well let’s say random things).

My Twitter handle is “winxatU”. Come find me. I warn you though, my tweets are not always about mommy things and I occasionally swear more for some reason and sometime I talk the biggest load of crap. So come find me at your own peril. ;)

PS: I have yet to post said TwitVid. I think as I’m typing this my bravery has called it a day and left. I will not uninstall the app however. Bravery might still try and make an appearance!

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We have a long weekend coming up. Last day of work today until Monday again. I’m happy yet apprehensive. The kids are going to be all over. Luckily it’s just the one public holiday tomorrow while the next day is just a university holiday. Which means it is mandatory that we don’t come to work on Friday. A1 still goes to work on Friday and dear L will be there on Friday. Hey! I might even go get my hair done on Friday!! Can you hear the applause? Or is it just in my head?

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Work has been looking up lately. I have been informed that I will be acting in an HR consultant position. Meaning I will do a lot more than the arbitrary paper work and such. I will be handling interviews, making offers etc. Hopefully when that position is advertised and I apply it will be as good as mine. We hope!

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Its official, I have picked up weight (again!) I was doing so well. These pants I’ve got on today are slowly suffocating me! (Hmm, maybe the pants have shrunk?) I will not show it. Nope. Will not. The fact that sitting is becoming harder by the second and the temptation to loosen a button is becoming unbearable will not deter me from giving the game away. I shall start (clearly only after the long weekend duh!) with the diet plan asap! And the next time I wear these pants it will fit perfectly and not try to cut off my circulation! (stupid pants!)

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I am on a cold fighting mission. A1 currently has one and yesterday I practically bought up a whole pharmacy so he could take meds and get better real quick. The colds and flu’s that are going around at the moment are (according to reports) rather bad. Once he is better I think we are all going to go get that dreaded flu shot. The new flu vaccine apparently has something added in to prevent Swine Flu as well, which is particularly dangerous for little ones and old people. So I should get my finger out my rear and get it done!  I also really can’t afford to get sick right now. Well can mommies really afford to get sick period??

 

I’m Branching Out…or at least trying to

Ok, so my ego got the better of me. I didnt think that I would get to this point but I have. And frankly I kinda like it.

I recently registered and got accepted on Top Mommy Blogs! I think its a fabulous little community and a wonderful place to “meet other moms”.

Now you see that badge icon on my side bar (on your left)? The one with the juggling mommy?  Just under the pics of the kids? Yeah, that one. If you click on it you can experience Top Mommy Blogs for yourself. Really is a great site and I reccommend you have a look mommy blogger or not. Oh yes, and everytime you click, its a vote for me! This also helps my ranking on the site.

Ok, and yes, it has boosted my ego a little bit. Today is a shallow day for me. I have those moments all too often. These days anything that can put a smile on my face or make me laugh is top notch in my book!

So go ahead, click that button. An amazing site awaits you! And it’ll put a smile on my face! :)

I Hate It!

I hate it with a passion. It is necessary though in order for us to live, but I still hate it. And yes I relish the fact that it gets me out the house and away from the kids, but I still hate it!

Grocery shopping!

The mere thought of being in a grocery store with trolley and trying to navigate amongst the thin isles (why are they so damn narrow??) gets the claustrophobic in me all panicky!

I don’t even need to explain how my blood pressure rises when the item I’m looking for is not there and the shelf label says “out of stock”. That would mean I would have to go to ANOTHER grocery to find said missing item coz I need it! (With twins around our luxury list decreased in size monumentally!). Did I mention I hate grocery shopping?

Then of course are the queues! I haaate queues! Of any kind! Doesn’t matter where it is, I hate it! I, coz Murphy is out to get me yet again, ALWAYS seem to pick the slowest queue! Without fail! It sickens me.

Let me tell you about my loathing for queues. I once stood in one for what seemed like an eternity to get my ID book changed. I stood there so long I actually began to cry out frustration! Couldn’t have cared less who saw me, I wept like a baby.

But I digress, back to my grocery issue. Am I literally the only woman who feels this way? I cannot give you a rational explanation to the hatred, but its there and will probably remain so till I die!

If I survive doing it tomorrow I should get a noddy badge! ;)

A State Of Undress

I have discovered that N has a new hobby. She likes to be naked. She, at odd times, likes to take of her top and relishes the fact she doesn’t have a top on! I’m beside myself.

I was also well on my way to calming myself down and to realise that, HOPEFULLY, this is a phase. Then I get home today and L tells me a tale so horrifying I damn near wanted to have a stroke!

Side note: the next paragraph or two might get nasty as I’m gonna be graphic. I might also swear because the thought of what I’m about to write raises my blood pressure!

Ok, so turns out N has an affinity to undoing her nappy of late. I have noticed this but have reprimanded her and she hasn’t done it on a regular basis. In any case this morning N decides she was going to undo her nappy completely! L was in the kitchen and having breakfast and the kids were playing quite nicely for a change. However playing nicely for N meant that she undid her nappy and had just her pj pants on. No probs you might be thinking. Any mother will probably have a stroke at what happened next! I know I would’ve!

N proceeds to the corner and decides then and there would be a good time to make a poo!

Side Note: it seems the twins have a tooth coming out at the back. A molar for each of them. No real effects (thank goodness) but just a looser than normal poo. Yes, do you now see where I’m going with this?

So there she is in the corner making her poo which then ceremoniously slides down her pant leg and to the floor! By this time L is looking at N in abject horror! And of course A, being ever ahead of his age, stands on the opposite end of the lounge area and just says “disgusting”!

Its not over.

She then decides her pants is now dirty and takes it off! And then has a wee! L stated she nearly died at this point and at an attempt to stop her N further decides to rub the poo all over further on the floor before lifting her hands up and showing them off proudly!

L said I would have had heart failure right there! And she’s right I would have! WTF? If she pulls that stunt again I have half a mind to take her outside and hose her down! Their poo nappies of late, because of the molars coming out, have stunk to hi heaven and I have a sensitive stomach!

I believe this is not an odd occurrence for kids her age, but geez I’m not keen for the clean up! Like I said I’m beside myself!

Note to self: watch N like a hawk ALL weekend!!

Thursday Thoughts…

I sometimes sit and think of the strangest things. No, I honestly do! Little musings if you will. Why do I do this? I’ve put it down to one of two things:

1) I have sometimes way to much time on my hands OR
2) My brain just won’t shut off.

I’m thinking it’s the latter really. Anyways, here are some of the thoughts that dwell in the asylum that is my mind.

1) Why do kids choose the most inopportune moment to dirty their clothes? Like just before you are about to leave to go out?

2) Ever walked to the fridge, opened it and just stood there not knowing what it was you wanted? Yeah, been there. A lot.

3) Why do kids always want to eat the food off your plate and when you put the exact same food in their plates, they act like its poison?? (Well mine do that in any case)

4) How come getting things out of the box is a lot easier than putting it back in?

5) If paper was for eating it would have been part of our diet. Now to just explain that to N!

6) Why do they create kids’ movies that are designed to give parents a stroke?

7) I’m convinced they should start a course for moms on how to drink coffee cold.

8) Someone should do research on kids and their “mommy-is-just-about-to-sit-down-for-the-first-time-in-a-long-time-so-lets-do-something-naughty” radar.

9) Why does it always rain when the car has just been washed?

10) How come whenever I’m in a hurry the cars on the road want to drive like Miss Daisy?

11) Funny how it is that the kids will wake up in the morning that extra hour earlier than they supposed to after you went to bed later than usual the night before.

12) Why are kids’ shoes always in the last place you look after having turned the whole house upside-down?

13) Someone should invent a baby-poo-nappy-changer type of machine thingy.

I also discovered a cute little site called Nanny Deprived (www.nannydeprived.com). Its fun, with all kinds of quotes, poetry etc. And it’s all about moms! Here are some funny quotes, but please go check the site out as its pretty cool! :)

“I suffer from M.A.D.D. – Mommy Attention Deficit Disorder.”
~Raenita

“My second favourite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint – Erma Bombeck

“Cleaning up with children around is like shovelling during a blizzard”
~ Author Unknown

“Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life.”
~ Author Unknown

“If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylum would be filled with mothers.”
~Edgar Watson Howe

“I know how to do anything – I’m a Mom”
~Roseanne Barr

“It’s not easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it.”
~The Golden Girls

“Raising a kid is part joy and part guerrilla warfare.”
~Ed Asner