Birthday | A Little Less Fluff

This was meant to happen on Friday. But clearly, I didn’t get to it.
Ok, so yes, another year older and a year…wait, wiser wouldn’t be the word. Healthier? That I am less likely to kill someone? Whereby I feel more in control of my life than I have in the last two? Where stress is not THE major catalyst that will end me(its still there, its just not the thing that’s going to prematurely bring about my demise)? I don’t know.

On Friday 29 August I became another year older. I should imagine this would be, as most birthdays should be, time to party. You know what? It didn’t phase me. I could have cared less that I was indeed another year older. Thankful for another year on earth, but that was about it. Usually, I am rather upbeat about my birthday. Usually. This year was kind of like just any other day. Normal. Absolutely normal. I just didn’t “feel” it.
I had so much love from friends’ wishes that it was wonderful and heartwarming and again I was thankful. But, I just didn’t “feel” it. You know?

Is that what happens when you grow up? (I never really wanted to do that growing up part). Or is it that a birthday (mine) just does not hold any weight with me anymore. Would that be considered weird? When I reread that part, it really did make me sound like I fell off the crazy bus. Granted, I have been on the bus more than what was considered normal, but this time, I was nowhere near. I just wasn’t into it. And it was just a pretty normal day.
Its just that I had life to do. You know, working, being mom, life. Whether that sounds like an excuse is not relevant. 😉

To all those who took the time to send a message or to call me, you’re awesome. You’re all absolutely awesome. Xoxoxo

Here is a question:
Have your own birthdays become less relevant to you as you got older? Yes or no, I would love to hear your answer. Let me know in the comments below. 🙂

I had some grand post planned. I really did. Something meaningful and wise and wonderful. In truth. I have nothing. I cannot think of one damn thing to say that will sound profound. So I will focus on something of an average nature. Something that maybe will make me smile. Things I have come to realize in my lifetime. Yeah, that’ll do.

You see, today folks, I celebrate my 30th Birthday.

I had some idea of what I wanted to say to my 20 year old self, but then thought about it and came to the conclusion to focus not on the past as such and more on what I have learned in my 30 years of existence.

Either way, here it goes:

I have learned that you can have all the patience in the world. Up until you have children of course. Because somehow, it just seems to dangle by a thread or disappear completely.

I have learned that no matter how sick you are, you will always carry on to see to the needs of your family.

I have learned that no matter what crap day you have had, coming home to smiling faces and kisses can mean the world.

I have learned that no matter how hard you struggle, you will find a way to come out on top in the end.

I have learned that you can be pushed to your limits and be close to a psychotic break and yet still remain sane enough to change a nappy.

I have learned that having that moment with your partner where you laugh together for a good solid five minutes is like heaven.

I have learned that I have aged exponentially faster than what I would have liked. My hair is about at grey as the average 50 year old. My knees and joints are permanently not happy with me. My back hates me. And the dark circles under my eyes make me look like an extra from any one of those zombie movies.

I have come to appreciate sleep.

I am thankful that I have the ability to put the brakes on just before I am about to snap and become some psycho mom.

I have come to learn that I am not alone in this battle (and sometimes blissful) period that is motherhood. I am glad that I am not the only one who thinks the same way I do. And I appreciate all the women who stand up and admit that motherhood is not all it’s cracked up to be.

I have come to learn that no matter what the age, kids will always attempt to outsmart you. The key is to get smarter. 😉

I have learned to appreciate the little things.

I have come to understand that I will never be perfect, but that that fact shouldn’t stop me from aiming high.

I wanted to do 30 of these, but I got tired/distracted again. But I think I have managed to learn quite a bit. 😉