OK, seriously…

​Parents, let’s get real here for a second. Let’s just get real and discuss the issue like the adults we are. Or supposed to be. 

Homework. 

What’s the deal hmm? Is it just me or are they piling the kids pretty strongly these days? I’m not saying I have just noticed it, I’ve actually been debating this for the last two years (mostly with myself and the Hubs). If I can recall (which is sometimes hard), we really didn’t have THIS much homework everyday when we were at school? Especially not at 8 years old! Besides that fact, it is also repetitive homework. What is the deal here? 

I actually recently saw a video comparing kids from Finland vs United States regarding homework. Interesting indeed. Did you know that Finland has the best education system in the world? I repeat, the world! I duly went and googled this to see exactly what the hype was about. I was not disappointed. I am most certainly not advocating that there should be a no homework system etc etc, but do yourself a favour and google “Finnish Education System”. Watch the vids on YouTube. And yes, I know I am comparing apples and pears here, but it is still damn interesting.

Like I said I am not advocating anything, it is just amazing the results Finland is getting with the changes they have made over the years regarding their education system. Percentages/rankings in Math and Science, for example, for Finnish students are one of the top in the world. Its amazing to see. Would that sort of system work here in South Africa? I honestly can’t say. There would be a tonne of work to do first. 

Aaannyyyways, in between classroom work and extra curricular activities, there is homework Mon – Fri. It is exhausting for kids who aren’t even a whole 2 digits old yet. I feel for them. My two are troopers through it all though. But I know there are those parents out there who struggle daily. And its not easy. What are your thoughts on this? Would love to hear.

Until next time

A Little Less Fluff

Short Fuse…

Exactly

Ok, so I have noticed that my ability to hold my anger or annoyance to certain things has gotten a lot shorter as the years go by. About 8 – 10 years ago, it would really take a lot to get under my skin. These days it sometimes just takes someone looking at me the wrong way for me to become instantly annoyed or aggressive.

• I become rather uptight when the kids don’t want to go to bed on time. Me knowing fully well that they will be exhausted at school the next day, which leads to crankiness and moaning and crying (sometimes by me) etc. I’m sure you get the point.
• I become insane when the boss at work does not want to approach the Executive Director regarding a matter that clearly only he at his level is able to approach the ED with.
• I spit acid when asked to do something purely because no one else wants to and has blatantly refused the boss’s instruction. Have some balls boss man!
• 24/7 “shiny happy people” annoy me. Coz Seriously? There is no way you can always be in a good mood. I want what you’re on buddy.
• Paying an exorbitant amount for a premium tv package (you know who I am referring to) and there is bloody nothing to watch on any of the 100+ channels!
• When you earn more money than me and you’re in the top job, do not expect me to do your job for you. You were hired in the post under the fact that you could actually do the job. Imagine that!
• When I say I am sick I mean it. The fact that I come to work to continue to provide a service to my clients does still not mean I will do your job for you. Also? I am grumpier than normal.
• When the till at the grocery store says 10 items or less, for the love of all that is good in the world, don’t come there with more than 10 items!!
• If you are a learner driver I can understand that you need practice out there in traffic in order to get the experience. But never ever think that driving in the “fast lane” is ok. Because that is when I lose my sh*t.
• Taxi’s. ‘Nuff said.

There are probably more things that would make my blood boil, but I will not regale you with that. It could go on forever.
Even through the darkness that is life’s annoyances however, there are most definitely things to be thankful for and things that make me happy and smile:

• Coffee
• Cigarettes
• Hugs and kisses and I love you’s from my family
• A nice cool afternoon
• Perfect silence
• A roof over our heads and food on the table
• Good friends
• Laughter
• A good book (although I haven’t read in ages, but you know what I mean)
• Making friends with people who live in other countries and yet it feels like we’ve known each other for years 🙂

*Thanks “your e cards” you couldnt have said it any better (as usual)

Hey There…

So here I am once again. And no, I am not going to bitch and moan about how I haven’t been here or haven’t posted enough. It’s pathetic and I have no one but myself to blame. And for that, dear readers, I am sorry.

So where am I head space wise? Well, neither here nor there really. I am not as angry as before. But find my patience to be one on a very (and I repeat VERY) thin thread. I still regularly take the stress/anxiety pills to ease my shattered nerves. So far I have not committed any heinous crimes against humanity (read: colleagues or family).

I find that I get annoyed very easily as well. I used to be able to have a strong hold on how quickly I could become annoyed. It used to take a bit of work. Now, it’s just a matter of saying something stupid and I react. Needless to say this happens mainly at work, and I should really learn to curb the words that spew from my annoyed mouth.  I’m getting “looks” already. But currently my attitude of “you need me or else you are F*&%ed” is getting the better of me. I should just go for longer walks around the campus. However that is also difficult to do when you are in a meeting. *sigh*

I have but a ton of work to do, but you know what? I am taking this opportunity to blog. Coz damn it, I need a break. I need to just be able to let it all out there and say I am NOT a slave and will take a 5 minute break to clear my thoughts (currently mainly vicious ones). This also includes a cup of coffee!

Cheers till another time folks….

Are Fairy Tales Really All That Nice?

It wasn’t that long ago (ok, maybe in end of last year still) that A1 and I were discussing children’s stories (I do not remember how we got on this topic) and how if you really look at it, they’re creepy. 

I was going to post about it and then somewhere along the line I forgot or got distracted or something. What brought it to my mind today was that one of the morning radio DJ’s had mentioned it while I was driving to work. And then of course it was like “OOOOOHHH YEEEESS, thaats what I wanted to do!” (a month or more later). 

I mean, have you really read ‘Little Red Riding Hood’, ‘Goldilocks and the three bears’, ‘Hansel and Gretel’ just to name a few?

It just kind of seems that ‘Little Red’ enjoyed disobeying her parents, was lazy and just spoke to any strangers she came across. Old ‘Goldi’ over there just teaches’ us that breaking and entering is cool. And if you read the actual Grimm fairy tale, she actually gets eaten by said bears. When the ‘Bears and Goldi’ became all cute and nice is beyond me. 

Speaking of the Brothers’ Grimm, I don’t think they intended for their stories to turn cute. The aim was to make children aware (and probably afraid) to not get up to any shenanigans (yeah, I used that word) or else! Obviously I think we would probably do more psychological damage to our kids had we read it the way it was intended to be read, but hey, don’t call them fairy tales then. Maybe call it “Book of Scary Sh*t” or something. But fairy tales is not it.

Another point is, if you have a look at the “fairy tales” (Not all from the Bros Grimm though, but still “fairy tales”) that they have turned into full blown big budget movies, its kind of dark. Case in point: Alice in Wonderland, Red Riding Hood, Snow White. What on earth would make them think we would take young kids to see that? Its freaky.

 

Summer, You Bastard…

I know I am doing the “be positive” thing, but bloody hell I just gotta moan about this some more!

I will not pretend to like the fact that it is as hot as hell outside. I will not pretend that I enjoy Summer so fricken much that I could easily spend my days on the beach. No, I can’t. I detest it. The heat makes me sick. It affects my mood. I hate being all sticky.

I think (more often than not) I have bitched and moaned about the heat. It is intolerable. It ranges from dry where your nose burns to totally humid where you are sticky and clammy all the time. No amounts of cool showers work as you tend to sweat worse after. It borders on ridiculous.

The kids tend to be twice as agitated with the heat. Making it impossible for them (and us) to get a good night’s sleep. Last night included. It is just not on.

N decided that around midnight she would not sleep in her bed. She was moany and wanted to sleep in ours. What she failed to realize is that it was just as hot in our room as it was in hers. No solace there. A eventually gave up and went to sleep on the couch (which is far from very comfy). I had two three year olds beat the crap out of me while attempting to fall asleep. Inclusive of a kick to the face. Wonderful. I think my last look at the clock before falling (passing out) asleep was 01h45 or something.

My cheek bone is still sore. Luckily no bruising.

Also? For the record? My office has got no fan or air con either.

My Summer curse continues…

A Note To Colleagues…

Dear Work Colleagues

Sigh, where do I begin.

When I started here in April I was excited for the prospect of working again (I still am) and meeting other adults to talk to (maybe not so much anymore). I walked in on that first day with hopes of a wonderful working relationship and really, for a second, you had me fooled.

As time went on I noticed some kinks in the shiny “awesome working environment” armor were beginning to show. The glow of the polish was starting to fade. True colours were starting to show. I started seeing the backbiting, the gossiping, the inefficiency of staff, the lack of interest in any work related responsibilities, the superior attitudes, the bending of rules to get whatever is necessary, the cliques and so forth.

Ordinarily you would just say, why don’t you just get outta there? Well I’ll tell you why. It’s very difficult to find another job at this time of year. Also I can’t just quit because the salary helps. Also I quite like working. So my solution is basically one of just keeping to myself and if one of you are friendly enough to want to chat I shall do so.

You see, I do not need your approval of whether I am a good colleague or if I fit into your “group” to get my fucking job done. I do not need you to be holier than thou and treat me like I am some kind of intern in the beginning of a working career. Remember while you were still studying and fucking barely scraping by I was in the working world already edging my way trying to make a name for myself. I am older than you and to some degree I’m also sure your mother taught you some means of respect for that. I do not need the condescending undertones in your voice like everything is a joke to you. Some people have real problems in life rather than “I don’t have tickets for the big game this weekend, what AM I going to do! Boo hoo”.

Also, dear colleagues, maybe if there is something you have on that pea brain of yours that can assemble some thought, how about you speak to the person (whether it be me or anyone else) directly instead of looking at that poor person strangely or making “in the air comments” right by them. Its rude and you certainly have no spine if that is the way you intend getting your point across.

And finally, I am of the opinion that although some of you may think that the work place will crumble should you leave, I have news for you. IT WONT. Unfortunately, and I know this must be devastating to your ego, the work place will run just as normal without you. Yup, you heard me. It’ll carry on. I know this might come as quite a shock to you, but I reckon someone had to tell you. You’ll get over it.

Sincerely, Yasmin

Is It Me? Or Is Today Just Crappy?

You know what urks me? (Yes, I said urks and I clearly am also not sure of the spelling.) When you are a good citizen and tax payer and you get treated like rubbish.

Honestly.

My morning was not a good one. Somewhere along the scale of “can we just give today a skip please?”

 The power went out at 04h30 this morning. I was not amused. I like electricity. I really do. I cannot live without it. I’m not designed too. Luckily we have a gas canister outside attached to a small two plate stove. Because I swear if I did not receive my morning coffee I would have lost it right there. I. Must. Always. Have. A. Morning. Coffee. Period.

 So trying to get ready for work was horrible and we had minimal torches. Then of course the kids woke up. Waaay too early. And this hampered getting ready. So we were running late. I hate being late. You think I would be used to this as trying to go anywhere these days and get there on time is a mission in itself. But no, I can’t let go. I hate being late.

 I got to work later than normal and wanting to phone the municipality to try and get an idea of when the power was coming back on. Also, obviously, to fight with them about service delivery and what the hell do I pay taxes for? And if this was a scheduled outage how the hell don’t they send out notifications of such and don’t they take into account people with small children and babies???? Only 5 minutes after getting to work my nanny texts me to say the power is back on. I’m deflated and I was amped for a fight.

 I wanted a fight actually. Fighting would have eased the pressure in my brain that is now giving me a rather shit headache. Also to appease the mind Gods, aka Karma, Inner Peace and Chi who got up and left me to deal with Irrational, Anger and Bitch. They got up and said “screw this, today is not happening” and just left me with the other three. Needless to say I shall be in a shitty mood all day.

A Little Less Dramatics Please…

I find it very strange how the human psyche works. In fact I was going to study Clinical Psychology after school. That idea kind fell by the wayside. I don’t know why, but at the time it did. If I had the time and money I would do it now. After all, you’re never too old to learn.

Back to what is bothering me. Colleague

Yesterday at work I asked a colleague (she is an assistant) if her boss was busy as I needed to speak to him. She responds that he has someone in his office. I then ask (since I know she has access to his emails because she has done this for me before) if she can check if her boss received the email I sent last week and subsequently resent yesterday morning. I kept on getting an “out of office” reply. She then responds and says why don’t I just ask him. I say because it sounds like it is a very important conversation happening in the office and I don’t want to interrupt, and ask her politely to just check with him later if she doesn’t mind.  She says no problem.

 An hour later she comes to my office and says that her boss wants me to print said document I had sent him in the email and bring it to him. As she is turning around she says “oh, and he says don’t your ever threaten him through me again” and promptly walks away. WTF??? No, I mean What The Actual F*CK??

 Did I say something to her that completely set her off? Did I in the least threaten her or her boss? What the hell is this about threatening anyways?? I must have had some other conversation that I don’t know of, or zoned out and spewed all kinds of rubbish while under some restraint. How come I don’t remember this? 

When I went into her boss’s office with the document he didnt give any signs that he was pissed off with me. Clearly she had been having a bad day? Or year. Or century. Whatever it is/was, she was nearly two steps short of a bitch slap.

 I decided, for the benefit of everyone, that I shall show some restraint and give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she was having a bad day. She usually pops by and we have a chat. She has been very silent today. Very. I haven’t seen her interact with anyone really.  Unless I am being given the slip and she is talking to everyone but me. I shall give her a couple of days.

Yeah, Shoulda Seen It Coming…

Ok, I maybe should have seen this coming. To just think that it would just be tolerated was a little stupid on my part.

My girlfriends don’t invite me to girls’ nights anymore.

Frankly I don’t blame them either. There is only so many times you can hear the same answers from a person and not get annoyed and just not bother to ask anymore. I would have stopped inviting me ages ago.

Don’t get me wrong, I want to go, really! I just can’t seem to get out the damn house. I can’t leave A1 alone with the twins as I don’t think he will last that long. To essentially go out I would have to ask my mom to baby sit. This means that I can’t stay out late as I need to come and fetch them and get them into bed and, and, and!!! See how this is NOT a winning situation.

The only time I really get out and about is to actually go and do grocery shopping and the like. Sad isn’t it? Yeah, I have had many a pity party just for me.

I am thinking that I need to get out of this hole that I have dug for myself.  And fast.

I cannot begin to tell you how the lack of a social life (and I’m not talking raucous parties etc. just some nice chats with friends at a restaurant or something) is slowly leading me down a path to self-destruction. And from what I gather, that will probably not be a good thing for my household.

Argh all the thinking and anxiety over this is aggravating the migraine I woke up with this morning. I think it might be a hormonal problem. That will probably be another post altogether. It probably also means a trip to my gynea. I don’t want to go. But I probably have to.*sigh*

A Little More Patience

I used to have an endless amount of patience. I used to be calm and serene and it would take a lot to really tick me off.

In the 2 years and 8 months since becoming a mom I have completely lost that. I mean completely. There’s not even a bit hanging by a thread. That broke a long time ago.

I now lose it for almost anything. This is solely because of the kids. I know it sounds bad to blame them, but its the honest truth. I’m laying it out here for everyone to read. Its because of them I have no patience left and that it has filtered into not having patience with the outside world.

I have become “that” customer. You know the one. The one who has a total flap when the slightest bit of service is not satisfactory. I hate myself for it sometimes, as sometimes it is worthy of just letting it go but I cannot control it.

I have spent the majority of the day being a bad parent. Yelling at the kids for their fighting, climbing and touching on things. I should’ve been able to handle this better. Should’ve being the operative word. I couldn’t. I lost all sense of composure.

I don’t know if I will ever be able to recover that “me” that could handle a situation without the dragon lady (aka bitch) making an appearance. I am totally irrational and will inevitably be in a crap mood the rest of the day.

I reckon only time will tell whether there is hope for me or not.