Difference of opinion

About a week and a half ago N was at the doctor due to Tue fact that the day before she was crying in class because of an ear ache. She had been complaining of a sore ear on and off for the last two weeks. I would gently rub behind the ear and check pressure areas to determine if there might be an infection. Whenever I did this she wouldn’t flinch or scream in pain. It would then be over and all was well. The crying in class was when I decided that maybe she needed to see doc and that he would determine what the issue was. My child does not cry in class. She can be sulky at best, but doesn’t cry. So off to the doc she goes.

There was nothing wrong. As in nothing. No blockage ( nice and clear and healthy according to doc) and of course no sign of infection. I was happy. Then came the questions. Does she grind her teeth at night? Is she doing this for attention because her twin brother gets more attention?
I was floored. Really? REALLY?? You think I don’t give her enough attention and now she is coming up with fake ailments do get it? Really? No. The answer to those questions is no. I have been extra careful in that regard. It couldn’t be.

I resolved that evening to engage with her a little more. She seemed fine. Quite content that THE DOCTOR has said her ear was good. Hardly attention seeking right? Then again would she do that just to go to a doc?

Well I have secretly monitored her for a week or more and have not changed my normal interactions with both my children. She is 100% fine. Some happy, dynamic little girl I adore and love so much.

Which brings me to a thought: was it just an attention seeking tactic? Does she merely love going to a doc like a mini hypochondriac? Or was it genuinely aching at the time? I’m still on the fence here.
I would love some feedback from other moms with multiples or moms with children close in age. Has this ever happened to you? Or something similar perhaps?

I’d love to hear the opinions on this, so hit me up in the comments section.

xoxo

I am well and truly amazed & honored!

I really never thought that something like this would EVER happen. I am more than estonished and overwhelmed!

I recently received an email from the lovely Lexie over at voiceBox.com informing me that I am a nominee for their Top Multiple Parenting Blogs section of their Top Blog Categories for 2014.
I am not even being coy when I say it is truly awesome and flattering and wonderful!!

As many of you know, I startd this blog as a way to vent and also to connect with parents of Multiples or parents gong through similar situations or emotions. The blog has gone from strength to strength and my journey of being wife, mom and working mom.

The interesting part revolves around the big blue button on the side there. See it? Yes, that one. :) I would really appreciate it if you could take the time and please vote for me? I have never really asked anything like this before from my followers, but I hope that you will be kind enough to do this for me. Voting could get me into the Top 10 spot. If clicking on the blue badge does not take you to the site please click Here
Just scroll down until you see the top 50 Nominees. Im number 5 on the list. You can vote once a day. Which is great. ;)

THANK YOU all you wonderful followers, because if it were not for you, this would probably not have happened.

Much Love
A Little Less Fluff
xoxo

Those Little Game Changers

It is truly amazing how kids constantly change. I mean just when you’re getting used to their mannerisms, they change the game with something new.
Case in point: N & A started Grade R this year. I know N to not speak as much as her brother. Her communication skills are not where her brother is. I also do not under any circumstances compare them as every child develops in their own way. But people, two days! Two days is all it took for this little madam to develop communication and language skills that I have never seen before! Which is great. Except the attitude (diva) that came along with it.
I am now just a tiny bit concerned that she can be easily swayed into whatever and I have always encouraged my kids to be themselves. I could, of course, be completely paranoid as usual. And granted, she is only 5. Right? Right????

A on the other has decided that he, upon entering the world of Grade R, would turn into a complete smart ass. He now has a tendency to speak to us and Nanny L like we were never educated and sometimes tells you instead of ask you. That, ladies and gentleman, pisses me right off! I am currently on the ‘corrective measure’ train to get him out of this particular mannerism he has learned. He is a bright boy by all accounts, but no one likes a snotty know it all. One who sometimes comes across as pompous and arrogant to boot! I am sometimes surprised by the level of language that comes out of his mouth. He’s bloody 5!!!

They also have managed to develop the ‘skill’ of changing their minds every two minutes. You can buy them something nice and apparently it isn’t the bloody favourite anymore. I’ve taken to not surprising them with stuff. Its easier to just ask what they like. Because along with the ‘I change my mind every two minutes’ ability, they have also mastered the ‘utter outrage that you don’t even know what I like’ look. Manipulative is what I call it.

Be that as it may, there is one thing I can guarantee, they certainly keep you on your toes. Unless you’re exhausted. Then perhaps its a slight murmur in the background.  ;)

Seeing Through The Fog…

It has been nearly two full weeks since I started at my new job, and wow, what a difference in life it makes when you’re in your correct working environment! I literally feel like a brand new human being! I’m not even kidding when I make that statement.
In between my meds and getting the opportunity to bond with the kids more by now being able to take them to school in the mornings, and a new more stable working environment, I think I might actually get the hang of this “Life” thing. I somehow feel a little less out of control and a little more balanced.
I know all the issues within me as a person are not 100%, but damnit it feels good to ‘see through the fog’ for a change!

Just as recently at 3 months ago I was ready to walk out of my previous job with no further employment to go to. This folks, as we all know, in today’s climate is not a viable solution. I might not have elaborated as eloquently as I should have about how bad the “hell hole” really was on this blog, but some insights are here if you search the tag or category of “Work”.
The place was (and I’m not exaggerating here) literally killing me. It was sucking out my will to carry on. When I say soul sucking, I mean it! It is really an interesting topic of discussion (psychologists take note) “How a working environment can affect a person’s overall well being”. Or maybe there has been research on this?

I pretty much had two personalities. The wife & mom at home who was OK and content. Versus the working woman who was miserable out of her damn mind close to a nervous breakdown. It when the “working woman” started creeping into “wife & mom” that the alarms started going off. I have it on good authority that it is damn near impossible to function this way. Yes, obviously we behave differently at work than we do at home, but that is the difference between professional and relaxed at home. That is the ideal way to function. I clearly wasn’t. Hence the alarms. Which I also clearly ignored. For way too long.

I suppose in hind sight I should thank my previous employment for pushing me to the breaking point in that I finally sought help. Which led to tests, which confirmed numerous things for me. The depression being one of them. So yes, I shall give them that. And only that.
Granted there are people that I do miss. OK, only two people really. It broke my heart that I had to leave them behind when I can clearly see how that place is affecting them. I sincerely hope that they, by some miracle, find other employment too.

Now don’t get me wrong, the new place is far from perfect, but those challenges can be managed. Those that being on good stress. It is the negative stress that does the damage. Remember that.
I also had to tell myself, and consciously do every day, that I will not fall into the same work “traps” again. The same shit that contributed to my health decline (mental and physical). The same shit of dealing with incompetence and just accepting it. And in general, the same shit. Nope, no more. Fresh start, new outlook and all around better functioning.

Here’s hoping you all had a decent week and if not, remember that as much as what you think you are alone, you’re not. You sometimes just need reminding of that. So here is me reminding you!
XOXO

I Looked A Little Deeper…

As human beings, we often tend to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of daily life and such and kind of just become drones. I know that sounds strange, but its the truth. At what point did we become like this? At what point did we forget to stop and “smell the roses” as it were?
Society in general puts pressures on the youth, young adults, working/married couples to constantly strive to that utmost of achievements. And yet when you step back, ask yourself “what is it that I truly want?”.

If you just take the smallest of moments, you’ll realise that there are people around you who love you. That friendship doesn’t end when you start a family. That the most irritating of questions from your your young children is giving you the opportunity to nurture their enquiring minds. That even if you think you are, you are not alone.

In all this, I do actually have a point, seriously, I realised that especially the last point rings so true. My post yesterday yielded such a response of support, encouragement and acknowledgement from others that it struck me (and reminded me) why I started this blog in the first place. Support, encouragement and acknowledgment.
A week ago I was thinking of deleting it all together. The husband, in his wisdom, stated that it would be a bad idea. The blog is a testament to how I’ve progressed and how far I’ve come over the years. My journey to the here and now is laid out in the 150+ posts I have. I let the thought go with a reminder to myself that I would come back to this. I did. Last night I let it all out. Here, on my blog, and I don’t regret my decision to keep it. It is truly a chronicle of my journey and I wouldn’t let it go for the world.

Yes, I know that was some deep sentimental shit right there. A little introspection does wonders for the soul.
To all my followers (old and new) I thank you. I really do. Rest assured I’ll be around more often this time. ;)

New Lease On Life…

I know the title sounds rather dramatic, but I swear that is the way it feels.
So much has happened since my last post that I am sure if I had to put it all down the post will go on for a long time. I will try and sum it up to the best of my ability.

I have always figured that something was not just right for years now already. But you know how life is, you kind of just cope and carry on. I realise now with the stressors I have had over the last years the signs were always there. Always. I have just somehow managed to cope all along. That is until my body decided to raise the alarm for me.
After months of speculating as to what my rapid weight loss could be about, including tension headaches and all kinds of other situations, I finally went for tests. Full on tests. I had avoided this forever.
It confirmed what I thought all along. Chemical imbalance leading to depressive disorder. Years. Years of denying the fact had got me to this point. Years. Besides a possible future thyroid issue, the main catalyst was the imbalance.
I now am on meds for a 6 month period after which I shall be evaluated again. I do feel it has made some difference. I see more clearly now. More clearly than I have in years. My head does not feel as cluttered. But I shall continue to monitor my own signs of improvement or none.

On the endometriosis front, well, its kind of a situation where there is little to no ovary function. Pre mature ovarian failure (I’m seriously not that old), I think those were the words used. I dont think this has affected me as much since I have my twin lovelies. Had I not though, it would have broken me. Making above situation 100 times worse. But am attempting some oestrogen treatment and we see how that goes.
On a side note: The comments recently by TV “doctor” Dr Drew has raised a storm amongst the endo community for calling the disease a “garbage bag diagnosis”. The shit storm surrounding Dr Drew has still not died down. Which is right by me. Endo is such a silent disease that there are millions of women suffering with this. Every awareness that has been raised about this disease has basically taken a knock by the “doctor’s” comments. Rest assured the shit storm is far from over.

One major change for the better is that I finally did find new employment. I actually start the 5th. I am super excited for the first time in a long time about work. This is the direction I am wanting to go and so many career opportunities that I can barely contain myself.
Those of you who have read my blog regularly will know the issues I have had surrounding the “hell hole”. Well folks, I am finally rid of that place. FINALLY. It is actually a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. It came at the right time (mainly due to situation above) in that I feel it will speed up the process of not having to be on meds of the kind I am taking now.

I think that is about as short as I can keep it without mouthing off for pages and pages. I would at least like to have you visit again. ;)

Have any of you had an experience where denial has led to something drastic health wise? Let me know in the comments. Would love to discuss.

Until next time….

2014…

So a New Year is upon us all and I am sure everybody is back in the swing of things. Work, kids back at school or perhaps first day of school and the usual chaos that ensues.
Before going back to work while on my vacation (all be it a short one)I tried to reflect on what 2013 has been like and lessons that I have learned throughout. The below are some of the major ones:

Kids will always be some kind of enigma. They are evolving constantly and as a parent, I have found at times that it is sometimes difficult to keep up. It could also be of course that I am a working mom, but nonetheless I find myself sometimes baffled by what comes out of their mouths. I am the first to admit that, yes, I at times do underestimate them in terms of their independence and perhaps I need to lay off the “molly coddling” as it were.
Lesson? Try and go with the flow (a little).

Kids are giant germ carriers. Really. Despite my best efforts, trips to the hospital emergency room were unavoidable in 2013. Also at God forsaken hours. *sigh* Lesson? Try to be less of a germaphobe and understand that kids will get sick. However personally, I draw the line when your kid is in hospital for 3 days. I had to restrain myself after that to not go into full sterile mode and put them both in plastic bubbles forever. *sigh* So, the internal battle continues.

The harder you work, the more people will take advantage of you. The lesson is that you can work hard and provide an excellent service, and just say no when necessary and valid. You are no one’s door mat and will not let the stress kill you. Mantra for 2014? “I will not stress over shit that is not within my control”. Yes, it’s a mantra, I don’t do resolutions. Whether or not this mantra stays throughout 2014 is debatable, but I shall give it a shot in order to avoid the stress and anxiety. Also, will look for another job.

Some health issues have popped up in 2013, but seems to be manageable. I hope. I have for a long time lived with endometriosis. Managed just fine with the help of my wonderful doctor. Things have progressed to a level which is different right now and that requires certain other treatment. But yes, manageable for now. Which I am happy about. Lesson? Don’t panic.

I recently took a look at my blog and found it to be somewhat on the side of just mom stuff and kid stuff and work stuff and… well anyway, you get the point. So look for big changes in 2014! New and interesting things are afoot. Granted it might take a while, but I am glad to still have you all around to experience it with.

xxx